Friday, November 4, 2011

How "My So-Called Life" Ruined My Dating Future

Admittedly, I was on the young side when "My So-Called Life" first aired, but even though I wasn't a teenager like Angela Chase, I knew a brooding hunk when I saw one. The first time Jared Leto as Jordan Catalano appeared on my TV screen, I knew I would be a bad boy lover for life. I mean, hi:
Minus the flannel (and part of me does miss 90s flannel - hey, it was comfy!) ever since I set eyes on this moody, broody, angsty, pretty boy I have been destined to be attracted to men with long dark hair, light eyes (check out those baby blues!) and a devil-may-care attitude. Oh, and a complete inability to commit.
He DOES lean great, doesn't he?
Could those eyes be any bluer??
This one wins. This is how I will always picture Jordan Catalano and what every man I have ever dated has had to live up to. Which probably has a great deal to do with why I'm single now. I love them bad boys. I do!  I can't help it. Especially the charismatic ones who whisper naughty things in your ear one minute and then ignore you the next. The ones who have a tortured past who you know you, and no one else, can fix (and you can never really help them, try as you might). The ones who will never settle down and be happy in a relationship even though you try and try and hope and pray that YOU are the one who will change their mind.  

I know the universal question is, why are women always attracted to bad boys? But I think the universal question is, how can you not be? I mean, sweet Jesus, what do we want more than what we can't have? Yes there are some smart women out there (I give you a shout out) who settle down with a nice guy for a happy life. I don't know why I can't do that (I've tried) but it seems I am incapable of being happy without drama (sad but true). It's like an illness I've tried to overcome, and I keep thinking it will happen when the right guy comes along; that perfect man who is a mix of angst and devotion, only to me. A brooding family man. A man who is sex obsessed but only I, and no other woman, will do.  

Men can no more control if they are a bad boy than women can control if they are a "stumbler." A "stumbler," coined by my best friend, is not a ditz. A stumbler is a woman who is perfectly intelligent and capable of taking care of herself, but she has such a wide-eyed, innocent approach to the world and everything she does and everyone she meets, that she melts the hearts of men around her and they want nothing more than to catch her if she should fall. Men follow the stumbler around like puppies who are desperate for attention. This includes those bad boys too - stumblers are the only ones who can melt their hearts.

I am not a stumbler. I couldn't be if I tried - because it's not something that can be learned. It's like a natural state of being which I do not possess.

Men look at me and they think "sex" or "bitch." Which, fine, we all have our type casting (and ingenue I ain't) but until I can retrain my brain to be happy with a nice guy, I am doomed to wander the planet searching for my Jordan Catalano.

There is one thing that makes me feel better though:
I draw the line at mohawks.

Shout-out to Missed Periods and Other Grammar Scares for inspiring this post. There is no shame in loving Keanu.


Brittany said...

I was out of high school and happily married when I got hooked on My So Called Life and Jordan Catalano. He is definitely a looker, that one. I used to like the bad boys too, but then a good one came along who I couldn't resist. So I said, "are we getting married or what?" Good thing he said yes, because that could have been a really awkward moment if he hadn't.

prerna pickett said...

I was young when this came out, too. But I had an older sister who LOVED it, therefore, I did as well. Yeah, even back then I knew how appealing Jordan was. But thankfully I settled down with the 'nice' guy, who has his streak every now and then.

Missed Periods said...

Thanks for the shout out.

You are attracted to guys like the Jared Leto character you fell in love with, and it just occurred to me that in the first movie I saw Keanu in he played a sensitive musician and my husband is a sensitive musician. Could this be a breakthrough theory?

Amanda Leigh Cowley said...

Jared Leto is rather gorgeous, (swoon), but that mohawk photo is a great tonic! Am sure a guy will come along one day who is the perfect mix of bad boy vs nice guy, just for you.. until then, so many nice guys to lust over ;o)

Trisha said...

I want a good boy. I want a good boy who is fun in bed too. I want a MAN who is adventurous in the sack. LOL.

Is that why I'm single too?

Jared Leto is SO sexy in those pics above...not so much the mohawk. But I'd take a mohawk any day over dreads!

Deniz Bevan said...

Well, you had me at Jordan Catalano. I never understood why that show didn't go on longer.